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“Because once you depart from this one-way road of life, there is just no getting back on.”
Aaaargh!
 It always stinks for me when Halloween comes right before  deadline day because what I want is to just sit around waiting for  the little Trick-or-Treaters, maybe hide behind the living room curtains Boo-Radley-style but no. Instead here I was trying to get my column done.  (This is me in the living room - I never stop to sit down right; I just kind of slide in to home plate and start clacking away. ) Then the  doorbell rang and rang again and rang again and again and sure Old Dave is  finally home from Germany but I made him go upstairs to the watch the  Rangers vs. the Giants so as not to wreck the spooky feeling down here in the living room which meant  I was all alone on door duty. And they kept coming and coming, little  bumble bees and ogres, fairy princesses and  and even one wee little MD  complete with hospital ID and a stethoscope and didn’t it turn out that I  BOUGHT THE WRONG CANDY.Silly me, I thought kids got sick of chocolate on Halloween,  the same old M & M packs so I only had two dozen of them. The  rest were Mike & Ikes, Skittles and Twizzlers, and those little hands  dug into the bowl again and again past the latter three to get to  chocolate pay dirt and there wasn’t enough. Never mind the kids with  their Unicef boxes which we forget about every year. We had only pennies  and dimes so ended up giving out dollars and the tide kept coming until  all hours and finally when it stopped I sat down and, well, here ‘s what  happened:
It always stinks for me when Halloween comes right before  deadline day because what I want is to just sit around waiting for  the little Trick-or-Treaters, maybe hide behind the living room curtains Boo-Radley-style but no. Instead here I was trying to get my column done.  (This is me in the living room - I never stop to sit down right; I just kind of slide in to home plate and start clacking away. ) Then the  doorbell rang and rang again and rang again and again and sure Old Dave is  finally home from Germany but I made him go upstairs to the watch the  Rangers vs. the Giants so as not to wreck the spooky feeling down here in the living room which meant  I was all alone on door duty. And they kept coming and coming, little  bumble bees and ogres, fairy princesses and  and even one wee little MD  complete with hospital ID and a stethoscope and didn’t it turn out that I  BOUGHT THE WRONG CANDY.Silly me, I thought kids got sick of chocolate on Halloween,  the same old M & M packs so I only had two dozen of them. The  rest were Mike & Ikes, Skittles and Twizzlers, and those little hands  dug into the bowl again and again past the latter three to get to  chocolate pay dirt and there wasn’t enough. Never mind the kids with  their Unicef boxes which we forget about every year. We had only pennies  and dimes so ended up giving out dollars and the tide kept coming until  all hours and finally when it stopped I sat down and, well, here ‘s what  happened:
And remember, Halloween is just the start, am I right? Because look what's waiting in the wings:
And after that it’s holiday parties and Yankee Swaps and strings of twinkling lights all tangled together as if in some Dental Floss graveyard...Just pray you can be ready, people; it’s all I can think of to do. That and maybe put on some weight to build up my strength.:-)

